Atrophy


With the fall came the passage of time, and with the passage of time comes atrophy. Everything that is ordered is in a state of decay. It takes great effort to fight against this decay. Without effort, construction will erode, machines will fall apart, organizations will collapse, and even knowledge will fade away.

This is abundantly clear in 1 Nephi 16. It’s clear all throughout the scriptures, but stands out particularly to me in 1 Nephi 16. There are wide swings in faithfulness in this chapter, that can only be explained by the passage of time. Nephi didn’t go and find food, and the very next day his brothers threaten to kill him because of the death of Ishmael. No, surely after he brought home food Nephi would have been celebrated and revered because of his exceedingly great faith. Certainly they would have recognized his faith and trust in the Lord is what literally put food in their mouths. 

However just a few short verses later, Laman and Lemuel were threatening to kill their father and brother because of the death of Ishmael. As I pondered these verses I couldn’t help but think of my own life, and how I go through swings. We get so focused on our challenges or successes that soon the burning testimony that fueled us slips away to time. The constant weathering of time causes our memory to fade, our knowledge to weaken, and our desires to evolve, allowing the table of agency to set a new and provide yet another opportunity to reveal our character and etch our disposition. 

Without this decay, we would make one decision and our course would be set. The train would be on the tracks, and in that direction we would go. In the world we now live, people change, redefine, develop, all throughout their lives. You can meet someone, be separated, and seven years later they can be a totally different person, based upon the choices they’ve made, but none of that would ever happen without the decay of time.

Often I have lamented that I can’t hold on to the burning fire that comes from witnessing miracles, and seeing the arm of the Lord revealed. There have been many times in my life that I felt to never do wrong again. The very thought of sin, or wrong, or sloth repulsed me. My soul was invigorated and I felt a desire to move the world. Why can’t I bottle that up and sip from it’s goodness daily, and have that fire enblazened on my memory for forever. Because of time. 

The saying goes, time heals all wounds. I believe it would be better put - time obscures all things, thus obscuring the pain, love, strength, vigor, anger, bitterness, passion and any other attribute that defines our character. Thus we are free to become, and our choices daily get to define who we are. We are truly free, agents unto ourselves, charting our course one step at at a time. As Alma put it - we are in a probationary state.

So choose to be faithful today, and faithful the next. One choice won’t chart your course forever, but it will get you closer to the person you want to be. God has provided a perfect training ground to refine our character, because although the choices we make don’t chart our course for all time, they do have an impact over time. A faithful choice today will affect tomorrow. It may not directly affect next year, but it will increase the likelihood of making a faithful choice the next day, and the one after that, and the one after that. 

All of this to be said, I’m grateful for time. It’s part of God’s perfect plan of salvation. And although we can resent the inability to hold on to divine feelings for forever, we can rejoice in the ability to change throughout our lives - because we all need the ability to change.

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